Mom Jeans

Someone at work mentioned that someone else was wearing "Mom jeans" so I found this to make sure everyone has seen this video from SNL.

Funny Mom Jeans Spoof Funny Video! This is a spoof on how some women start wearing those high waisted pants after they get to be a certain age. You know this is true because you see women wearing them all the time.

Carport Mixup

So this may not look like something out of the ordinary... unless you know our address. We do not live in unit number 3. We live in number 11. When I came out to my truck this morning I wondered why the car looked to far away. After starring at it for a second I realized that Andrea must have accidentally parked in the wrong spot! The neighbor was forced to park in non covered parking last night apparently. Good thing that lady is on the HOA with me and is Andrea's hairdresser. I could not help but take a picture and laugh all the way to work. I am thinking we need bigger numbers are our parking spots.. lol!

By the way... here is what our new car looks like!

Happy St. Patty's Day

Here are a few coworkers of mine!

Easter Bunny

Is there an unwritten rule somewhere out there that easter bunnies are supposed to be creepy? I was looking for an easter themed picture to use and I found these and couldnt help myself from commenting. Enjoy.
"Perfect prefect... now BE the bunny... you are the bunny put your hands up... you're a natural!"

Bucky Bunny with some kind of pink rash on his face.

Only the cool bunnies wear fake Oakley sunglasses.

Asian bunny visiting the kids... so nice.

This is business bunny hop'n off to wall street.

This is early 90's bunny with his vest on. His face is saying... what's that smell?

Special bunnies...

"This job sure beats any job I had in prison!"

Evil bunny. The girl is looking a little nervous. "Well he is the easter bunny... go ahead..."

This one is probably the Martha Stewart of bunnies. She probably made her own hat!

Easter bunny goes to college. "Why do want to take a picture of me with my friends anyway?"

"This is a little softer than my prison uniform!"

This bunny has no legs and looks more like a rat don't you think?

Creepy bunny + knife + cake= freaked out kid (who said math is hard)

Abraham Lincoln bunny. Four score and seven....

Gang sign bunny... this one is from the hood.

This man just realized he was wearing a bunny suit.

This is sophisticated bunny. "I can't see without my glasses!"

Eyes up here bunny!

GREENPEACE & QUIET

I am looking for a little "greenpeace and quiet" I'm sure I'm not the only one on this planet that is sick and tired of people trying to get us all to "go green". Here are a few of my frustrations. This week I picked up the recent copy of Readers Digest, apparently for the past few months they have been pushing and pushing the "green" lifestyle. The most recent one pushed me over the edge. This article was giving tips on how to be an environmentalist... one of the tips was to push for tax increases on fossil fuels so that people will be discouraged from using fossil fuels (Gas). Well if thats the case I wonder if Al Gore will stop flying his private jet all over the world promoting cutting carbon emissions. If you want to be so called "green" great... do it and shut up about it. That's your choice... I don't want to go "green" and thats MY choice so don't force it on me. I feel like every time I turn the tv on or listen to the radio its all about doing whats right for the environment to stop global warming. First of all I don't even believe in this global warming nonsense. I believe that the earth warms and cools over time and its been that way since it was created. I do not believe that human activity is the cause for any warming trends we may be seeing. Even if we were the cause as humans, who is to say that we could reverse any effects. Who can tell me honestly that if everyone changed their light bulbs to those expensive "friendly" ones or if we didn't use plastic grocery bags we could put a stop to global warming. I think global warming is the convenient "look how great I am" trend. Celebrities are promoting this to no end as well... hmmm... maybe because someone famous is doing it I should too. Give me a break. The last people to be trusted are celebrities. I just wanted to state my thoughts on this media outbreak we call "going green". I also think its funny that we don't hear very much about global warming in the winter when we have to dig out of the snow... It seems to be the topic of the daily news in the summer when its supposed to be hot outside. I think one way we could avoid this hype is to just turn the news off... walk away and worry about our own lives rather than whether or not the sky is falling... oh I mean earth is warming.

Here are some environ-mental-ists for you...

This guy apparently believes that foregoing pants will save the planet.

I can image him making a creepy old man laugh in this picture... "ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

War and the environment... yep very related topics.

Pat is that you? I have been looking for him... I mean her... errrrr.

Funny Gum Commercial

The Worst!

I just realized that I walked all the way across campus with my zipper down. I passed at least a hundred people! Ah man... thats the worst! At least no one called me out on it.

Crocs.... shameful at best!

Andrea and I were traveling back from Arizona, we were sitting on the shuttle that was taking us back to long term parking when I heard a women telling her husband how warm it had been in Utah. She leaned over and said, "Its been so warm you could have worn your C-R-O-C-S!". I first thought it was funny that she spelled it out and then it hit me... he must be ashamed that he owns and enjoys wearing crocs. For those of you who don't know what crocs are then you have nothing to worry about. If you know first hand what crocs are... because you own a pair... pay attention. You need to burn those as quickly as possible. Consider this a public service announcement... when it gets warmer in the next few months... buy some flip flops (thongs) and put your crocs out in the trash!


I am assuming that this is a man wearing these crocs by the hair on the legs... I could be wrong but can you see what crocs lead to! Socks with sandal like shoes! Please see the light! Think twice before you wear crocs!



Here is another man wearing crocs... they're navy blue which is a slight improvement... but why in the world would you want to look like you have duck feet?

Rosie wears crocs... is that not reason enough???????

This to me is a huge red flag! If people have found ways to embellish the crocs to make them more appealing to young kids... they are not for adults anymore! Time to move on. I have an example from my childhood... I remember when the Coolio song "Gansta's paradise" was really cool... I also remember the moment when it stopped being cool... I was driving in the car with my Mom and she knew and sang every word. (We were driving in her car and were headed west on Lake Forest Blvd and Toledo Rd.) Do you understand where I am coming from now?



If croc decorating is something that young girls do at slumber parties... then maybe grown men and women should not wear these!

Um... these should be outlawed!

I don't care if you are the president of the United States of America... crocs are the worst thing ever invented. Wearing these shoes is by far the worst decision President Bush has made as President.




Ok... this is what crocs drive people to do! Why in the world would a grown man in a suit have the desire to match his shirt with his shoes. This is a mess... I would send him home to change if he worked for me! I am sure his name tag reads: "Hello my name is... I have no women in my life.. do you know what I am doing wrong?" Yes we do... its the crocs!





There just isnt anything in the world like sitting next to a warm fire place with a hideous pair of crocs on. Notice there are no man legs in this picture? There is a reason... the ugly crocs scared them away.



So in conclusion... never wear crocs! Find another alternative. If you see someone wearing crocs... helps them! If you are looking to help people that wear crocs... here are some things to look for...

1. They are usually by themselves or with small children (also wearing crocs.. they will probably be talking about how to decorate their crocs.)

2. Look for people with fanny packs on! If they are still hanging on to the fanny pack... chances are they just discovered crocs. Stop them before it gets too serious.

3. Look for people wearing tie dyed shirts with wolves and bears and indians and rainbows and stuff on them. You know the kind... we have seen these at Walmarts and truck stops all over the country.

4. Your neighbor next store may even shock you... the people you least expect who usually have some fashion sense may be guilty of wearing crocs.

5. Hospitals across the country are flooded by nurses wearing these things... make sure they put real shoes on before they work on you... for sanitation sake!

PLEASE PLEASE THINK TWICE THE NEXT TIME YOU ARE TEMPTED TO WEAR THE CROCS YOU MAY ALREADY OWN. THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU AND WANT MORE FOR YOU THAN CROCS!

A Phrase A Week Mailing List

I have recently joined an email mailing list (I know who wants more junk email right?) that sends explanations for the words and phrases we use in the English language. I have always wondered why we say some of the things we say... I guess its mostly opinion based but I still think some of these explanations are interesting.

Here is one I always thought was interesting:

"I could care less!" : People have suggested that "I could care less!" is a mistake for "I couldn't care less," which it contradicts. Perhaps not. Bubble-gum English is different. The movie "Valley Girl" (1983) tried amusingly to capture the vocabulary and flavor of Valley-speak, the language of teenaged girls in the San Fernando Valley, who spoke in a sort of coded version of English (while teenaged boys prefer not to talk at all). The movie "Clueless" (1995) also dealt with teen-speak, and made "As if!" a sort of by-word. It apparently means "As if that could be true!" (said skeptically). I believe this sort of ellipsis explains "I could care less!" Just preface it with "As if" or "As though" or "Like." In this case, "like" serves as a conjunction (horrors!) rather than as the deplorable teen punctuation in which every clause begins with "like." Of course, the teen misuse of "like" is a venial sin compared to its misuse by grownups who should know better, such as those responsible for TV news and commentary, and for contributions to intellectual magazines like "Harper's" and "The Atlantic," where expressions like internecine, fortuitous, beg the question and a raft of others are routinely misused. Incidentally, if you'd like to hear young ladies REALLY talking to each other in code, watch the movie "Slums of Beverly Hills" (1998). And that's fer sher.

Dictionary Update

Fabulous: fab-yuh-luh s - This word should only used by women and homosexuals. Heterosexuals are immediately assumed homosexual with the use of this word. WARNING all "gay-dars" pick up this word when used. If you are heterosexual and wish to be portrayed as such please refrain from ever using this word. Consider the following examples:

Homo: "These potatoes are fabulous!"
Hetero: "These potatoes are great!"

Homo: "I'm doing just fabulous!"
Hetero: "I'm doing really well!"

Homo: "You look fabulous in that."
Hetero: "You look really good in that"

Homo: "We just had a fabulous time!"
Hetero: "We had a really good time!"

Homo: "Those shoes are simply fabulous!"
Hetero: "I like your shoes!"

Homo: "Thanks so much for the fabulous party!"
Hetero: "Thank you for the great party!"

Homo: "Your eyeshadow is fabulous... it really makes your eyes pop!"
Hetero: "... you look really nice!"

Hopefully the point of this lesson is fully understood. If you want your vocabulary to trigger questions on your sexual preference then continue the use of this word. If you want people to know you are heterosexual then I suggest not using this word ever again.